I read your poems again today Opened all of them in passing, once. Then cried inside, because I wasn’t sure Why I should cry real tears for you They were the preamble to your book, The voices I heard before I saw your face, The reality, the essence true Of the friendship that still binds me to you They were different from anything else That one like me could read of you For I felt as if I saw you new They weren’t words; they’re your soul, I felt The struggles of your spirit so sad They were all in the lines I read And now, when I think of your mirth I think again; why did I forget? Why did you laugh, and the next instant cry? Why were you so grim in one rhyme? And the next you were little more than a child? Why did you laugh, and the next instant cry? Did the poems lie, or was it you? Was the poet a demon, or were you? Is the one before me the hero, the idol,My friend, or is it just not you?

I am extremely sorry for my last cheat-post, which was only posted for the sake of posting something. Yes, i can stoop to such levels. but u try to type a halfway-decent post when the world's this crazy...and this sick. On one hand, the earthquake's still a numbing factor, and on the other, the cartoons of...well, u kno..the Prophet (SW)...it gives me such pain to associate the Prophet with the word 'cartoons'. I tried to write a post about that, but how cud i? whenever i started typing abt it, there was this mental block in me; the pain and despair weighed on my mind so much my fingers just stopped and lay on the keyboard...what cud i say that neone wudn't know already? so what do i write abt? the strikes? the usual threat to the McDonalds and the KFCs and Pizza Huts etc etc??? how lahore was becoming more unsafe than Karachi? the unexpected long weekends and cancelled classes and the police everywhere? i've never written abt nething like that...nothing i can say wud convey the fear... and now, wonder of wonders, our 'zinda dilanay lahori qaum' is once again gearing up for Basant. as usual, after banning kite-flying the whole year round, the ban is once again lifted...tho its sad that this time round it's for a whole 15 days. The impact of the earthquake isn't over-our religon has just been made a mockery of (again)-and still....the city's been taken over by Coca-Cola...banners of all colours fluttering around, bright red and yellow metal kites on every streetlight...and to top it all off, those big red banners proclaiming "Share the joy of basant by donating to the Presidents' Earthquake Relief Fund"...bravo, ppl, bravo... so, all kinds of ppl gettin killed by the door flying about everywhere...and a new things now...those plastic rods over motorcycles to ward off any killer dors...i have never hated the government more!!!