no one seems to be very interested in blogging these days, except for chij, so the internet, as a whole, is not a lot of fun. Even without blogging, there was always someone online, but not anymore. I'm just so damn bored... I also just came back from giving my first presentation in lums...i wonder why people seem so irritating when u stand up in front of them? All i wanted was for the ones who were looking at me to stop looking at me, and for the ones who were looking down to look up :P and more than anything, i just wanted to get the damn thing over with, though it was fun...that's my whole attitude towards this bloody institution-its fun, but at the end of the day i just want to go home, even tho 'home' now means nothing more than another place to study ur ass off. I remember the times when no one could hear my voice when i spoke up in class...no teacher could remedy this in school...and over here, my voice simply booms out without my trying. What the simple name of university can do to u... But i am glad to be back. studies keep my mind off what's happening to the rest of my life. It's going through major changes-and not good ones. Ever since my khalo was dignosed with cancer, 'life has simply been unpredicatble. My parents are rarely at home, and i don't expect them to be. My cousins are simply scared, so scared that they start crying at the littlest provocation...they're the same age as i am, so to see them crying like that, simply uncontrollably, is more disturbing than anyone can imagine. I don't have time to think, and Eid? This was the worst Eid of my life, of our lives. I can get over my taya passing away on the morning of Eid day, as he really was in such pain that death was the best thing for him in the end...of course, my dad is so depressed that he's just joking around all the time. So no one's talking much anymore, and i dunno why i've typed all this down when i should be in the libraray rite now...*sigh*...hope no one's gonna read this until i update again