Would it kill????

When I smile, at them, they don’t smile back. Sometimes they even smirk. That’s why I hate to smile. I’m laughing a lot these days, and I hate it. My laughter appears so…fake, more artificial than any make-up can be. And my smile, that smile which they hate so much, seems like an uncomfortable mask on my mouth. They’ve made it so hard for me that I can’t laugh naturally. Can’t laugh…can’t love…can’t see. At times I can just feel the darkness gathering inside my eyes. I’m said to be hypersensitive. Easily hurt, thin-skinned, touchy, you name it. All I can say to that is: what do you do with a person who is known to be suicidical? Do you taunt and mock them and put them through all kinds of tests to see whether they would or not commit suicide because of something you said? Or do you take extra care; remove all implements of harm from them? What do the psychiatrists do? Don’t they try to make life seem a little worth living to such patients? I don’t ask any of these things. All I want is that they would just stop trying to hurt me every chance they get. It’s amazing that words can be so sharp, to the point of being physically painful. Why should I cut myself when there are all those razor-sharp words slashing at me inside? There so much blood already, what use would it be to draw my pain on my skin? So would it kill them? Would it kill anyone to be nice to me? Or at least pretend to be? Would it kill you to CARE about a human being????